self destrustion

I'm at the point of mental combustion, stuck in this rut and,
All this extra weight just results in self destruction,
Beatin' up myself I need to find some kind of peace,
So I take that walk to the corner bar searching for release.

Twist the caps and throw 'em back that's how I numb the sorrows,
Getting lost inside a bottle forgettin' all my tomorrows,
Spoken word and smokin' herb to try and calm my nerves,
Turning my lungs death black, guess it's what I deserve.

Through all the cheap escapes used to break free from reality,
From all the pills and all the thrills that pull me down like gravity,
In actuality, I bring this pain upon myself,
So whatever the case, don't take this as a cry for help.



Contemplating the next step in this mysterious journey, yearning, this passion is burning,
For the cure to stop my stomach from turning,
I'd do anything to constrain this pain of my brain it's hard to stay sane with a weight upon my shoulders,
that's much more heavier than boulders.

Building up pressure inside it feels like I'm about to burst,
To tell you the truth talking about it just makes me feel worse,
Like I'm living a curse that's got me destined for destruction,
And when depression sets in it makes things difficult to function.

Trying to make things all right but wrong's the only thing that's left,
Can't even write this song right 'cause I don't know treble or bass clef,
Living my life day to day without knowing what comes next,
See that's what fuels my frustration, it's not so complex.